I'm Baaaa-aaaack

I was just really missing the gang on 8 South so I checked in to Beaumont Hospital for a few days. OK, that's not true and I haven't had one nurse that I had last year during my multiple stays. But I AM back in room 8489 and the balloon that was stuck in the tree outside my window in October is still there. 

I suppose I should backtrack. By Monday afternoon I really felt quite a bit better, chemo-wise. Then Wednesday afternoon I just started feeling...off. I can't explain it. Lightheaded, achy. Not how chemo makes you feel. It got worse on Thursday and included chills. I just hoped I wasn't getting sick. I was already scheduled to go in for bloodwork, as I did a week after my first chemo last summer. The results were exactly why they do that. 

They took some blood and took my vitals. My blood pressure was a little low and I didn't have a fever. While she was taking my temperature, I actually thought in my head, "Please have a fever." I don't know that I can adequately explain why, I just wanted there to be some reason for why I was feeling so crummy or proof that I was feeling crummy and for them to have advice. But, I had no fever. I asked if I could wait so I could see my numbers and took a seat in the hall. 

Minutes later, my oncologist's PA saw me in the hall and said, "I'm so glad you're still here. Come here. How are you feeling? Come sit in the doctor's office." (Where I've never been). She informed me that my white blood count was 0.2 and my neutrophils (my ability to fight infection) were 0.0. To give some perspective, a week earlier my white blood cell count was 2.7, which is low. When they postponed my final chemo last fall, my wbc count was 0.7. 

SO, I was basically walking around begging for anything to infect me, having no ability to fight it off. They were surprised I didn't actually have a fever and said, "Well, it's coming." They wanted to immediately admit me to the hospital and said I would be out in 24-48 hours. They let me run home to pack a bag real quick then I went right to the hospital, where they were waiting for me. 

Within two hours my fever was up, but came down pretty fast with Tylenol and hasn't returned. They also started me on two IV antibiotics and one oral antibiotic. In addition to being susceptible to everything in general, they're most concerned with the cdiff returning. It is still likely present in my body -- as it is in many healthy people -- but is an aggressive little bacteria likely to take over when my body doesn't have the ability to fight it off. CDiff can be serious -- even fatal from what I've been told -- so that's why they are ultra paranoid about it and started me on the heavy antibiotics despite having zero signs of it. 

I started having what seemed to be an allergic reaction after I received the two IV antibiotics.  At first they thought I was allergic to the first one and now it seems more likely that it was just a side effect of the other antibiotic, which tends to release histamines. Benadryl took care of it and knocked me out. Tonight I had that second antibiotic again and it did not have the same effect, so who knows. 

My oncologist came by this morning (Friday) and said she wants me to stay until at least Sunday or Monday, which means unfortunately I can't do the Shades of Pink walk tomorrow morning. My family is still going and I'll be there in spirit. Hopefully some kind person will take a group photo of them. The weather is supposed to be pretty crummy tomorrow, so I have to hand it to them for still being willing to go and do it despite my absence. They'll be coming to visit me after. I don't often have visitors so that will be nice. Because of the cdiff they advised against James ever coming so she's never visited me here. I'm glad she'll get to see where I'm at instead of just thinking I'm away somewhere. I told her she could push the buttons on my bed that make it go up and down, which she seemed pretty pumped about. I'm already regretting that and am anticipating going on quite a ride the entire time she's here. 

Anyway, they are constantly checking me and swabbing me to make sure I don't have any infections of any kind because, if something does come up, apparently it can get bad quickly. The flu swab was negative, urine tests were all negative and tonight they took blood to make sure I have no blood infections or infections in my port. And, again, still no sign of Cdiff. I've become pretty congested but other than that, nothing is going on. 

Oh, they're also giving me shots in the belly of something that's supposed to help push my white blood cells up. I'm hoping the bloodwork tomorrow will show some improvement there. Obviously my body wasn't quite ready to handle this round of chemo. My doctor said, assuming my counts are up enough to proceed with next week's chemo, she's going to drop the dosage by 20 percent. My guess is they'll be keeping a close eye on my counts from now on. 

There aren't a lot of great vegetarian choices on the hospital menu, but it's still been nice to order whatever I want. Any time I've been in here I've been in such rough shape digestively that I could barely eat -- and didn't want to anyway. I'm thinking one of my visitors can at least pick me up a decent salad or something tomorrow on their way here. :) 

That's about it. I was really hoping to stay out of this place this time around, but it seems as though it's the safest place for me. So, I'll keeping doing what they tell me and hope for the best. I've got a computer, I'm in the middle of a good book and the Food Network has programming almost 24 hours a day so I'm pretty sufficiently entertained. Hope to report from home with good news soon!